Fooling Oneself

Each of us was raised with a set of values. Some came from our parents, some from our community, some we adopted from a myriad of experiences. Many of these values seem to be reflexive ones. They are so ingrained and inculcated that we can iterate them instantly in any situation. Ex: Don't point your finger, that's rude.
I feel however, that many of our values need to reexamined as we go through life. In my case, I'm 64. I have discovered that some of my values are simply rhetoric and not my feelings about an issue. Specifically, I have thought much about charity, gifts, and kindness.
I thought it was imperitive that a person said "thank you" when I gave a gift or a kind deed. Certainly my parents drummed it into my head to always thanks others for gifts or kindness.
I drum it into my children's heads and my grandchildren's heads. I think saying thank you is a very important way of showing gratitude and acknowledgement when someone does something kind for you. I always try to say thanks. I value that highly, but that is not my issue.
My issue is: do I demand of those receiving gifts or kindnesses from me to thank me? I found myself reinforcing the idea that if someone failed to thank me, they were unworthy of my gifts or kindness and that I would be thinking much harder before they were recipients of my deeds the next time. Then I thought about the whole idea of giving. My value of the thank you was reflexive - I insisted upon a "here's a gift for you - thank you very much" connection. It is as if I need something back when I give. I'm not sure that is true.
I have concluded that anonymous giving is the essence of giving. Someone values helping others. They help without the thanks directed at them. I'm not sure I'm totally at that level yet, but I am sure that giving to others who need my help makes me feel good all in itself. Some how I still have a way of discriminating my charitable deeds, but when I give, I don't expect anything back from the recipient. I give myself a warm feeling and that's what it's about for me.
There are many others things I must reconsider. This was a start.

Centered

Being centered seems to be important physically, emotionally , and mentally. Being centered is hard to describe, but it involves self awareness, calmness, relaxation, stability, free flow of energies, and integration into the entire scheme of man and nature. There is no instruction manual for any of this, but it has been taught by masters of the arts of yoga, meditation and various forms of self-defense. The road is described as simple, but it is very long.
We westerners have little history of devoting years to develop skills. We want everything in one weekend seminar. I include myself in the group of impatienza, but I am starting on the path knowing that it is long.
My goal is self-discipline, inner peace, stability and flexibility and a greater outflow of charity.
Join me by starting on your path to the center.

The Road again

I have been traveling across the west to visit my brother and a friend in Colorado. The visits have been wonderful. I really need that physical presence with friends and family to renew our relationships. Phone and email are okay, but not sufficient.
The ride was peaceful and entertaining. A different landscape at every turn. Most were beautiful. Of everything I've seen so far, mother nature has done a better job than man.

Accidents do happen

Anyone who has read any of my blogs has probably guessed by now that I don't just believe things without evidence. This goes for religion as well. Anyone who is religious simply has to have some faith in veritable litany of obfuscations and acquiesce to truths that have absolutely no counterpart in real life. Much less evidence.
It is by accident that anyone is born into a family and thereby into its religion. This has nothing to do with religious belief. There are no Christ genes, or Allah genes, or Buddha genes. It is accidental that one is raised a Christian, one a Jew, one a Muslim, one a Buddhist. A culture surrounds that family and gives structure and support to those who grow up in that family and that culture.
Religions are inculcated alongside the surrounding culture. Acquiring that religion is an accident of birth. It is as accidental as having educated parents, or rich ones or poor ones or handsome ones .
Religion requires belief in things unseen, unheard, and unable to be tested or disproved.
The world is and has been plagued by people who do not believe in accidents of birth. People who somehow believe that they have the rights to impose their religious beliefs on others regardless of the others' cultural community. They believe something is true on faith and faith alone without looking for and demanding one iota of logical substantiation in the surrounding world.
So I say to the religious of the world, regardless of what you believe - or need to believe or think you might believe about your God or Creator or Master of the Universe -
Keep it in your mind. Keep it in your heart. Let it give you great peace and comfort. Be aware that for most of you these beliefs are an accident of birth. Don't expect others, even your neighbors to believe what you do without question. Don't expect others to even understand what it is you believe.
Without a church or synagogue or mosque or temple, what would you believe?
These institutions and sects thereof do not unify their religion, they divide it. They seek to solidify and seal a set of unique beliefs amongst its members that its members would never in a million years come up with themselves just by believing in a higher being.
Being a member of an established religious group is not the act of most critical, thinking people, it is keeping the bathwater with the baby. It is buying into the culture of acceptance for simply belonging to the Faith.
How would you be thinking today about religion, if your parents were Jewish not Muslim or Buddhist not Christian. Your religious beliefs - just an accident.

More Music Please

The simplest song can have the most powerful effect on my mood and well being.
I cannot in any way define a way to reproduce that effect with a new and different song.
The same song performed by a different artist might fall flat. Change the key.... no that's not right. Change the arrangement, the orchestration. Something is missing - no gut reaction.
I am still in awe of the complexity of music - given a relatively few notes to work with. Timing, duration, sequence, note, timbre.
Try to compose a song that has yourself swooning! I have done it in my dreams - I love dreaming. I am a magical musician. Asleep.

Brain Power

Have you ever felt that your brain has had enough and needed a rest? I have.
The brain uses energy at a rate of about 25 Watts. That's without a muscle moving. With continuous physical exertion that might represent 20% of your body's energy consumption. No wonder your brain can tire. Could you run your brain at 100 Watts? I don't think so. You'd get a hot head.
What, I wonder, is the upper limit of knowledge that can be stored and effectively retrieved in the average human brain. I mean,: facts, recognitions, behaviors, memories.
No matter how fast a computer is - memory is limited by physical storage devices.
This same is true for the brain - in a way... The brain has an astounding 100 trillion neuron interconnections called synapses. These synaptic structures can change over time to create more and more complex associations within the brain. But just how much "knowledge" can it store?
The brain operates much more slowly in neuron firings/second than a computer's operations/sec, so a computer can do an unbelievable number of calculations on a mathematical level.
Perhaps this capability far exceeds what a brain could ever do. But the brain has a storage and modification ability that computers don't (yet). We learn. We learn search paradigms, mnemonic devices, problem solving techniques that so far, has put us ahead of the standard
desktop computer.
Computers can grow in physical size, and components can get smaller and more efficient. New technologies seem almost endless (because of the human brain) . Will we be ever be able to stuff enough in our heads to catch up? Or in the end will we become mindless dependants on electronic thinking devices?
What are our brains' limits? Think about it.

Faith Hope Charity

You have heard that some churches ask a tithe of 10% of a family's net income. You also know that many families do just that. The result is that most major churches are very very rich.
One can do whatever one wants with his or her money, but why are churches tax exempt?
Churches own land, business, stock, much of which is income producing, but the government receives nothing from these profits. The rest of us pay taxes on investment growth. Why exempt the church? I really cannot think of even one good reason. If the church is considered an entity and its holding do not belong to church members, then churches certainly do make profits. They don't give away their excess capital.
The Catholic church rivals the largest money making corporation in the world in assets and income. The Vatican collects gold, jewels, painting, and other valuables. To what end? Primarily to provide for its own comfort and security. Check how much of their vast fortunes go to clothe the naked , feed the poor, heal the sick, house the homeless. Why do we need separate Christian charities like Save the Children when the Catholic Church alone could go a long way to saving them with its own funds. Missionaries seek to convert. Why? More Christians to contribute to the wealth of the church! Fewer heathens to worry about.
Jesus was a poor man. He shunned the idea of amassing wealth. Yet, there are many ignorant preachers today who get on TV and espouse how Jesus wants his followers to be rich.
Rich in spirit perhaps. How do you get rich according to these "men of God"? Send them your money (that makes one man rich....) and Jesus will reward you tenfold.. Oh yes! Don't work for your money. Buy a few extra lottery tickets (the entire game is fixed by Jesus). Skip a meal or a rent payment and send it to your preacher. God thinks that is a fine thing to do?
Take your money and send it a charity that helps people who are sick, hungry, oppressed.
Pick one that actually spends its funds on a good cause, not one that keeps it amassed in their own coffers.

Hawaii - Oh Oh!

I've been to various parts of the world. No, not a highly experienced international traveler, but I've sampled Europe, Asia and North and Cental America. I have yet to find a vacation spot as lovely as Maui. I like Oahu too. There is no architecture to gawk at and not many quaint old villages to tour, but for pure, raw
deep brain tissue relaxation, Maui's got it. The air is always redolent of tropical flowers in bloom, light and sweet. The temperature, day and night is warm, comforting, and soothing. Everywhere is mountain or sea. Yes, everyone speaks English, but so what?
Haleakala - majestic and central - creator. So much fun and so luxurious to bicycle DOWN. (did that twice - never loses its
attraction - IF you don't fall off your bike)
Fresh fish, fresh fruit, few bugs. Let's go.

Oy! man

Von Goethe said that there is nothing worse than aggressive stupidity. That might fit Tim Eyman who again seeks to earn money by pandering to the fears, ignorance and short sightedness of our public.
I-1033 is another example of trying to put money in the hands of special interests by pulling the wool over the eyes of citizens who think they might somehow benefit from his proposed tax changes.
There is a treatment for ignorance (which is widespread amongst voters) but sadly not for stupidity. Eyman is not an elected official. So what's in it for him to front rich commercial landowners? He gets paid to deceive us and pass these self-serving initiatives at the expense of the majority of us.
So if you are not a rich commercial landowner, all you will likely see from passage of this are fewer services and fewer public employees (for lack of revenue).
Educate yourselves people. Don't act stupidly unless you really have no reasonable alternative.

Winning at the Casino

I saw an ad on TV for one of the multitude of casinos around Seattle. What fun it seemed to spend your evenings gambling. How much more fun to WIN! Now of course, the casino doesn't say that the way they make so much money is that people keep coming back to win, but ultimately lose. Go often enough and certainly a percentage of what you bring will wind up in the casino bank.
But what a price for being entertained, if winning money is entertainment.
Imagine that this is your favorite entertainment and you do win money. When are you going to spend it? What good is the money you win if you don't have any other priorities on which to spend it?
Now, now..you can't use it to pay your bills. If you need it for that, then you shouldn't be gambling in the first place. That's just irresponsible.
Gambling - a waste of time. Spend your money and your time having real fun.

Big Government

People like to complain about big government.
Especially Republicans.
Yet it is difficult in this country to make a compelling case against it.
Oh yes, there is always waste in government. There are problems with communication between agencies within the government. However, without big government, can you really imagine the free enterprise system reaching an efficient equilibratory perfection? Never.
First of all small government with small arms of enforcement tacitly encourages criminal minded people to cheat and scam (even more than they do now) when government shies away from control. That would mean a degradation of civilization and its demise. Certainly government supports order.
Secondly, big government attempts to standardize, to some extent, the quality and levels of education our children receive. Without it, poorer areas of the country would be worse off than they already are in their ability to build and maintain schools and provide quality education.
Thirdly, we have already seen what avarice can do to a seemingly strong free enterprise economic system. The economy depends on some measure of financial regulation. When it falters, it requires some measure of stabilization. Again this is the role of big government.
Fourthly, big govenment links and cements smaller government. Smaller governments operate on local resources, needs, and priorities. Small local governments in varying regions or States do not have finances to maintain contant and effective liasons with each other.
Fifthly, big government is necessary to raise and maintain a well equipped national system of defense. This is not a job for free enterprise.
Sixthly, the protection and supervision of transportation, interstate commerce, health, and agriculture needs big government regulation, control and oversight to provide a safe, efficient and balanced distribution of food and services.
Finally, it is important to realize that WE are the government. We are paying taxes
to provide representation. If we don't like what we get we can change it with a vote. But we get what we pay for - nothing is free. I chose not to give up safety, security, health care, education and freedom by hoarding my money. Big government means big services (even if they are a bit wasteful and slow). Little spending means people get little in return.

Brew of the Gods

I love espresso coffee. Somehow I came across Martha Stewart's favorite. Keep in mind that Martha Stewart is not my guide to anything. I'm stilled pissed at her for her petty greed. Nevertheless I bought Antica Tostatura Trieste. Yes imported from Italy and soooo good.
This coffee is so rich tasting, yet so mild in acidity.
Somehow in the middle of the night, I got a vision of my turkish coffee pot. I could not remember the name for it. Next morning I searched and instantly recognized my ibrik. Turkish coffee should be made in the ibrik because it is specially shaped not to completely foam over and to hold the flavor inside. It is made of copper. I use it every so often, because you have to get super fine ground (powdered) rich coffee to make it correctly. When you are done, you have a few ounces of blow your mind coffee on top of MUD! Drink carefully, the grounds are not delicious.
And so in my search for the name I can across the Turkish coffee grinder a kahve degirmeni. After searching, I bought a popular Turkish brand of mill for $20.00
It is important to have fresh powdered grind and this is what these mills make.
I await its arrival and my new coffee treats. The brew of the Gods

Drink Up America

I love to drink good liquor and wine. I would love to get some follower who would like to discuss their favorites in their searches for best.
Skip wine for now - too many labels, but I do enjoy good merlot and cabernet sauvignon. So there wine snobs.
Liquor loves include Tequila and Bourbon. See how I've capitalized them. They deserve it.
Anejos are pretty much my first choices, but there are good reposados and blancos - Favorites - Don Julio Clase Azul, Herradura. Wish I could afford some the reserves - I've tasted them and been spoiled.
In any case. I'd like to hear from you.

I HATE CRIME

Of all crimes, I think I react most viscerally to acts of vandalism. Yesterday in Seattle some very sad misguided people decided to paint swastikas on two local synagogues. I am guessing these sad misguided people intended to send a message of hate, but they are primarily vandals.
What irks me most is that vandalism is a crime with a victim, but no good reward for the perpetrator. Acts of vandalism are signs of troubled wayward minds somehow ineptly striking out at institutions which they feel have hurt them.However, this revenge is not sweet.
Unless reported on the news, the vandals get no real recognition for their errant behaviors. Hell, they don't even go back to the scene and gloat "wow, what I great job I did breaking all this stuff.Hey, look at that glass strewn all over the floor"
In the case of the swastikas, many vandals don't even know the difference between the Native American symbol and the German Swastika which is a mirror image. Of course that doesn't matter to the criminal; his or her expression of hate is clear to us.
The act of vandalizing a structure more or less sacred, is also an act of cowardice. How can we reply to the vandal and discuss all the reasons for his animosity towards us? How can we communicate with him allay his fear of Jews and our secret plot to master the world? How can we bring him into the fold and give him solace and comfort.? We can't because this criminal is a cowardly yellow-bellied anonymous blot on humanity

Running Away

As any of us go about our daily business, it is certain that we give our universe little or no thought. It just doesn't seem to affect our lives. It seems too much to comprehend.
Because our lifespan is short compared to anything geologic or astronomical, forget universal, it probably does matter little that our universe is expanding. Of the hundreds of billions of galaxies we are aware (as scientists ) the ones further away from some hypothetical universal center, are flying off away from everything faster that the ones closer in.
So, if we had a few hundred thousand years at the speed of light, we might make across our own galaxy and do a little scientific exploration. But, we had better get a move on if we want to explore any more of the universe in person, because it is all running away from us at tremendous speed.

Shopping

I really hate shopping. That's why I love shopping on the internet.
Recently I'd had enough of my glasses falling off my face when I worked in the garden in the heat. Sweat lubricates my face and my glasses fall into the dirt. I need one of those nerdy elastic retaining bands (macho for sportsmen) .
I took my grandson to the mall today to have fun just walking around and seeing if I could pick up a band. One optical store had some ($10) but only in girly colors. No I'm not a nerd or a sportsman nor am I girly. Metrosexual perhaps, but not girly. The others optical stores referred me to sports stores. A separate trip. We'd had enough.
Online I found a simple black strap for $5 including shipping. I bought 2. Done. I highly recommend checking the internet and not wasting time and gasoline driving.

L'Chaim

I have health insurance through a public employees program. Health insurance needs reform. I am one of the fortunate.
No one should become gravely ill or lose their quality of life or die because they cannot pay the medical costs.
Life is about looking ahead to joy and being joyful. No one should lose life's values because they can not afford insurance.
We need to pay for the things we value and we need. Nothing is free. Good health is a necessity not a luxury.
The Republicans have become the party of "Wait, I have it, you don't, so screw you." Politicians should take the moral high road, not the economic low road.
Bah Repubicans.

Master of Something

Today while playing golf my buddy said his goal was to be perfect at just one thing. While neither of us have a chance in hell of shooting under 80 in regulation golf, he felt he could par a small nine hole course if he kept at it. Maybe so. But could he repeat it the next day? I doubt it.
My idea of playing golf is to be perfect at having fun. Haven't done that yet either. Ego pops up just when my accuracy declines. Golf is a sport and sport it is. If a non professional golfer can't have fun on the course, why play at all?
If I am trying to master something at my advancing age, it is mastering the moment to embrace the joy in whatever I'm doing or not doing. I feel joy just lying in bed knowing I don't have to roll out at the crack of dawn to work. I am mastering more moments.
When I don't get angry at myself for a bad shot, I'll have mastered golf.

Dear Umberto

I am slogging happily through Eco's Essay on Language and Cognition. Even my dictionary doesn't make reading much easier since so much is in Latin. He's a bloody genius and so interesting - too bad I can't understand everything. The first several chapters deal with being. Can being be defined by language. Can it be thought of in negative terms? What are the limits of being? How does the essence of something change when defined in another language? Is language discreet or continuous? Well, it certainly is food for thought though I leave each page hungry for more.

Ashen grey

What if you woke up to a world long since destroyed, the sun not visible through the soot in the air, the ground not visible through the ashes of a worldwide conflagration, the water fouled. What would keep you going from day to day having to scavange canned food to barely keep from starvation? That is "the road". Pulitzer prize. Fast read, but keep time to think! Keep a dictionary by your side